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Who Should Be on Your Guest List?
Courtesy wedding invitations are invites you give to people even when you know some factors make them very likely not to attend your wedding.
Courtesy wedding invitations are one of the trickiest parts of building your guest list. They are invites you send to people you care about — or feel obligated to include — even when you know they are unlikely to attend. Here is everything you need to know before you start writing names.
These are obligatory invites couples send out to people to make them feel included and not left out or to make them know that you are thinking about them. A typical example is a case of having three friends, but you are very close to just 2. It doesn’t make sense to invite only the two you have a more intimate relationship with. You have to give a courtesy invitation to the third to avoid her feeling left out.
Another example is having a very close friend or family member who stays miles away from your wedding venue. This may cause you to think that it may be impossible for them to attend your wedding. Sending out an invite to such persons is very important irrespective of whether you feel they can make it to your wedding or not. A general rule that applies here is that couples who are married, engaged, or living together must be invited together even if you have never met their significant other.
If you are close to someone, there is no reason why you should not give them an invitation, even though you know they might not make it due to certain circumstances. For example, if you extend a wedding invitation to a family member, you know they cannot attend due to distance or illness, the intention is to make them feel included and respected.
A courtesy wedding invitation is different from a standard invite — it carries a social obligation rather than a genuine expectation of attendance.
It is complicated to predict who will and who will not show up for your wedding. People whom you expect will undoubtedly show up for your wedding. However, you may be surprised to see those you had no idea will make it.
Many couples face many difficulties with trimming their wedding list because, at some point, almost everyone on the list appears important. They don’t know whom they should leave out. So, some couples use late invites as an escape mechanism, with the perception that those will receive late invites will not come. This may not be the best move to make as to cutting down your wedding list as your wedding invitation may have a high risk of being interpreted as a gift-grab.
So, the question is, ‘what criteria should I employ to cut off people from my wedding list?’
It is not mandatory for you to invite everyone to your wedding. People you haven’t spoken to in a very long time can be excluded. This does not apply to everyone because there are some people or groups of people you can’t cut off. Take the example of an uncle or aunt who you never get to meet or met once. They are family and need to be invited. Invitations sent to such people are courtesy invitations. They just got the invite because they are family.
When in doubt, sending a courtesy wedding invitation is always the more gracious choice.
There are some persons whom you have to send invites to. They might or might not show up. However, you should do what pleases you and make the most of your special day. It’s all about you!
For more guidance on wedding etiquette, Brides Magazine is a reliable reference used by couples worldwide.
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